Category: Family

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Family

The Boy’s Weekend

Here on the blog, I have a tendency to note kid related events that range from humorous to missteps. It’s easy to overlook the fact that a good part of the time, the kids are, actually, pretty well behaved. It’s even easier to overlook the simple task of giving credit where it’s due.

With that in mind, allow me to relate a bit about the boy’s weekend, noteworthy mainly for its lack of noteworthiness. It doesn’t make for the greatest blogging material, per say, but I’d like to give him credit for his good behavior.

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Family

Dad vs the Lass

Shortly after I started this blog, I wrote up this exhausting confrontation between an unstoppable force and an immovable object. Today I finally had a replay of that confrontation, only this time it was the lass playing the part of the unstoppable force. I’ll state up front that it was not on the same level as the battle with the boy, but it was the first time she and I crossed swords in public.

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Family

Parent Teacher Conferences

I suppose the title conveys the main point. We meet with the lass’ teacher this afternoon. We actually don’t have a meeting with the boy’s teacher. When we asked for a little consideration regarding scheduling to avoid conflicts with the lass’ teacher, she replied that she was comfortable with where the boy is at and unless we really needed to meet, she didn’t feel it necessary.

Now, my first reaction was, I think, completely predictable. Something along the lines of “Yes! We have the best 1st grader in the history of 1st graders.” But then my mind started turning and questions started bubbling up. Like, what criterion is being used here? Does she mean that he can walk down the hall without tripping and that’s good enough? Does she mean he doesn’t habitually pick his nose and burp and fart in the middle of class? Does she mean he’s ready for algebra? Maybe he can skip 2nd grade! Or does she mean that he doesn’t habitually drool on himself and his classmates? Or maybe he’s going to be writing a novel! Perhaps he’s ready to work at the Hadron Collider!

In the end, we figured if his teacher was “comfortable” with where he was at and didn’t think the meeting was necessary, we’d abide by that judgment. After all, she can probably use the break.

UPDATE: The boy’s teacher caught us after the lass’ conference. The boy is doing fine and apparently “right where he should be.” His “report card” is full of D‘s, D+‘s and W‘s. The D‘s were a little jarring initially, but the report card format is not from our era where we got a letter grade for a subject. These report cards have about 50 categories and they are graded on an “emerging”, “developing”, “well-developed” scale. So his report card shows good progress in everything- particularly math.

I’d still like to know more specifically what “right where he should be” means. My best guess is it’s just a standard response, designed to be unoffensive and keep parents mollified. But based on what can be gleaned from his report card, he is on the right track.

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Family

Pick Your Battles

As I was ushering the kids out the door this morning for their ride to school, the lass lamented: “We didn’t get to watch that much TV this morning, Dad!” Alright, it wasn’t so much a lament as a whiny protest.

In retrospect, I probably should have just shrugged this one off. But, for whatever reason, I took up her challenge thusly:

“Well, you got up late this morning, and it would have been later if I hadn’t threatened to have the dog come and jump all over you. Then by the time you got dressed, ate breakfast, brushed your teeth, and got your shoes- and all that with your dawdling in between- there isn’t much time left for …”

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Family

Tiger Cake

The boy has his Cub Scout Blue and Gold Banquet tonight. For his pack, all of the older Cub Scouts who have earned their Arrow of Light will be getting that award. It’s the highest award a Cub Scout can earn.

As a fund raising activity, the Pack has a Fella’s Cake Bake. The idea is that a father-son, or older male-Scout combination, work together to bake a cake. The rules, in a nutshell, no professionally baked cakes and the Scout and male leader have to make it.

The boy decided he wanted to make a chocolate cake with the Tiger Cub from the Tiger Cub badge on it. Here, presented for your entertainment, is the result of his and my efforts:

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Family

A Conversation with the Lass

“Daddy, how come some people don’t respect the American Flag?”

She’s already talking about politics? At the age of 5? More importantly, how do I answer that question?

Like this: “Well, some people don’t really respect anything, so why would they bother to respect the Flag, right?” I know it’s bad form to answer a question with a question, but hey- I gotta make due.

“But you’re supposed to respect the pouch!”

What? What pouch? Did she really say “pouch?”

“Respect the what?” I asked.

“Respect the POUCH.” she answered emphatically.

Oooooooooohhhhhhhhhh, respect the pouch!. This is definitely a conversation I can handle..

I think.

“Yeah, sure. You should respect the pouch.” I reply.

“Yeah, or funny things will happen to you like your head will TURN INTO A BALLOON!” She started laughing when she said that last part.

And just like that, I’m not so sure I can handle this conversation. I decide to test the waters:

“You know that stuff doesn’t really happen, right?”

She pauses. It’s too long. “Yeah, I know that Dad. But you’re supposed to respect the pouch.”

What do I say to that? Is there a right response? How did I end up in an episode of Seinfeld starring the lass?

“Daddy, I taught the kids on the bus the Godzilla song. They didn’t know it, but now they do. I sang it to the bus driver too.”

Is there a guy with a camera? Or has somebody mind-linked with her and is now messing with me? We’ve gone from respecting the flag to respecting pouches to Godzilla songs in a matter of minutes. Plus, she’s teaching it too other kids. What Godzilla song? Well, this one.

“Do the other kids know who Godzilla is?” That seems like a reasonable question at this point.

“Yeah. One of them has a D-V-D.” That last part is dripping with envy. I guess life would be complete with a Godzilla DVD.

“WOAH! That person is driving WAY to fast!”

Not as fast as the topics of this conversation though. Not even close.

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Family

I Don’t Get It

For some reason, the boy doesn’t like to change his underwear. I do not understand this at all.

I mean, I figured he would go on some sort of laundry efficiency kick when he became a teenager; but, I wasn’t necessarily going to have to be aware of it. Contrast that with, seeing as the Wife and I are responsible for the laundry, it’s hard not to notice when there’s 5 days of laundry in the basket, minus the expected quantity of underwear.

Parenting is not for the timid.

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Family

A Child’s Laugh

When I stepped outside to start the grill, the first sound I heard was the squeal of the lass, followed shortly by a shriek of excitement from the boy. They are sledding on the ice slush in the early Spring warmth and loving it.

I love moments like that because they have no idea I’m there listening. And the sounds of childhood coming from your child are like a sirens call casting a spell. You can’t resist the urge to go and see what they see; to laugh with them and enjoy their joy. You go there and watch them and see yourself through them; you remember what it was like before knowledge came into your life. Before bills and jobs and projects. You watch them and can’t help but smile as they frolic in whatever world they have conjured for themselves. And part of you wants desperately to join them in that world because it has to be better than the one we’re in.

But then they see you. The spell is broken. That world is gone. And as the high of their euphoria fades you realize: in this world you have them and their laughter, making it the best of all worlds.

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Family

Food Fights

One of the lass’ favorite gambits is to eat the portions of her plate that she likes, drink a big gulp of her drink (typically milk) and then claim that “She’s full.” She picked up on this game from her older brother, whom, mercifully, has outgrown the act.

From our perspective, it’s a tough call because a kid’s appetite seems to be a pretty variable thing. Are they growing? Did they run around a lot? Did they weasel a snack 3 hours ago? Knowing the lass like we know her, our default assumption is she doesn’t like what’s left on the plate and doesn’t want to eat it.

Now, if we left it at that her diet would consist of pieces of paper, eraser heads, cheerios, peanut butter, marshmallow fluff, candy and cookies. Roughly speaking. So sometimes we let her get away with “I don’t like it” and sometimes we don’t. We recognize that this kind of inconsistency is confusing to kids, but that’s life.

So anyway, dinner last night consisted of leftovers- some roasted chicken, potatoes and fruit. She ate most of everything, but didn’t clean here plate. We allowed that to slide because somehow her plate was actually portioned for her brother whom was having problems of his own at that point. I actually ended up finishing what was left on her plate after she decided she was “full.”

Naturally, an hour or so later she was hungry. She wanted some of the Girl Scout cookies we’d purchased. I told her no, no cookies- “But you can finish the ham sandwich you didn’t finish at lunch.”

“Is it going to be dried out?” she asked.

“It’ll be more dried out tomorrow when you eat it for breakfast.” I replied with a straight face.

“Will I have to eat it tomorrow?” she then asked.

“Not after you eat it tonight.” I replied.

Having gotten the message, she went over and shoveled the sandwich in her mouth. She was still working on half of it in her mouth when she said “I’m still hungry, Dad.”

“Why don’t you finish what’s in your mouth and then we’ll see if you’re still hungry.”

She gave me a big, chipmunk-cheeked, smile. Complete with a little food oozing out of her mouth.

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Blue Blanket

So the lass’ fever went away over the weekend and we ended up sending her to school today. But she wasn’t right when she got off the bus. She was very subdued, no spring in her step. When she got inside and had eaten her lunch, she laid down on the couch and took a nap.

Two hours later she woke up and her fever was back with a vengeance, though she wasn’t exactly acting sick. I informed the Wife of the fever and we were able to get an appointment for her for late in the afternoon.

Turns out she has an ear infection. According to the Wife, the doctor had only just looked in her ear when he diagnosed her. The doctor also noted that she wasn’t acting very sick- she was babbling away asking him questions and watching him write his notes very intently according to the Wife. He gave her a prescription and they were on their way.

When we put her to bed last night, she’d been in tears because her ear hurt. This was after she’d had her finger stuck in her ear- we’d just assumed she’d bruised it or something. The Wife gave her some meds to help and she fell asleep. But not before she took her favorite blue blanket and covered her ear with it. She said it “made it feel better.”

So tonight, when I checked on her before going to bed, sure enough she had her blue blanket on her ear again. Guess she decided to stick with what works.

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Family

Quiet Weekends are Rare

I’ve been tinkering on my computer for a good part of the weekend, continuing work on a program I wrote for working with my blog. It was nice to sit down and get the work done. The price paid is that other things didn’t get done. I suppose, this post marks the beginning of dealing with those things.

But to get to this point, I had to have the time to sit here for an hour or 2 at a time and concentrate. That means children have to be occupied in non-destructive, non-Wife-annoying activities for long periods of time. It helps when the kids are a little on the 5+ side- luckily for me, both of mine qualify.

Even so, there’s been nowhere we’ve had to go or be this weekend. Well, except for bringing the boy to his sleepover, but that doesn’t count because it was a dropoff and afterwards he was someone else’s to deal with. That left the lass and she was content to play quietly and then watch a Scooby-Doo marathon before going to bed.

But it’s been a loooong time since we’ve been able to claim a weekend like this. Between school, hockey, daytrips, errands and whatever else comes along, these sorts of weekends are just exceedingly rare. I expect that after this one, that pattern will resume. Such is the life of a parent, I suppose.

But it was nice to have the chance to exhale for a couple days.

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Family

It’s 10 O’clock on a Saturday

I’m celebrating my “hockey-freedom” weekend by sitting here at the computer, in the basement, poking around the intertubes. I slept in until 7, didn’t eat breakfast until after 8:30 and still haven’t properly dressed myself yet. Unfortunately, I feel a little guilty about the “up at 7” part. I’ll have to work on that for tomorrow I suppose.

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Family

Hockey- Season Finale

Due to technical problems and then getting sick, I never got a chance to writeup the family’s season finale for hockey which happened this past Sunday. It ended up being a marathon session at the rink; which was definitely appropriate since it seems like we’ve spent the last 4 months worth of weekends at the hockey rink.

First up, the Wife and all the other hockey Moms put on an exhibition of new found skill. They even had matching uniforms (well, jerseys anyway) and nicknames for everyone! They did about 15 minutes of warm-up drills showing off various passing and shooting (ahem) proficiency followed by a game consisting of 3 10-minute periods with a running clock.

Unfortunately, the Wife’s team couldn’t pull off the comeback at the end of the game and went down 3-1. But a good time was definitely had by all. Especially the spectators. The Moms were all exhausted by the end- even with the continuous clock. There weren’t enough players to rotate entire lines, so players traded off the ice for 2 minutes at a time or so. It seemed like the rests were getting a little longer as the game progressed. The coaches will have to be sure to make conditioning a priority next year.

The boy then got his turn. Each team had 2 lines, with coaches serving as the goalies. Each line got 2 minutes on the ice. They had 2 ten-minute periods with the final period being 12 minutes so that everyone ended up with equal ice time. Their game also had a (mostly- see below) running clock. With some creative “goal tending” the game ended up tied 6-6.

The boy had a goal and an assist. The best part was that he played hard the entire time he was out there. He played smart as well- at least, as smart as an inexperienced 6-year-old hockey player can play, I think. When teammates had the puck, he tried to skate with them but giving them space and not trying to take the puck; while also setting himself up for a pass when the other team collapsed on the puck handler. There were multiple instances where he skated to the net when teammates had the puck in the offensive zone. His assist was actually one of the best plays of the game. He was on a breakaway (both teams had lots of those) with an opposing player skating with him and closing in when he saw a teammate ahead of him with a clear path to the net. So he passed ahead to the teammate, whom scored a go ahead goal. He had a chance at a second, similar assist later in the game but led his teammate just a bit too much with the pass.

Just for fun, I’ll note that with about a minute to go the boy’s team was up 6-5. The opposing team was able to get something going around the net at that point and, during the scramble, a couple of us glanced up at the clock and noticed that time had “frozen” with 55 seconds to go. The other team managed to score and tie it up at which point the clock started “working” again. Miraculously, no goals scored in those final seconds.

I don’t know if that’s the right way to handle things, but every kid came off the ice with a smile on their face. None of them had noticed the clock “malfunction.”

The parents all had smiles on their faces as well. But for different reasons- we finally get our weekends back. Until the next sport’s season, at any rate.

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Family

The Lass Gets the Short Straw

Having just recovered from a cold, I was curious who in the family would be next. Early on, it seemed the Wife would fall victim as she started feeling a little out of sorts, but she now appears to be fine. But this morning, when the Wife came down the stairs, she informed me that the lass was complaining that her “belly hurt and she had a headache behind her eyes.”

Now, I’d be lying if I didn’t say I was initially dubious. She’s plenty clever and brash enough to come down those stairs feigning illness in an attempt at sympathy and a day-off from school (because when you’re sick, you stay home, rest, and watch TV! Honestly- how doesn’t that beat school if you’re a kid?) Especially right on the heels of my own experience.

However, when she came down the stairs she went right to her Mother, sat on her lap and stared at the pictures on the TV. I waited about 60 seconds during which time she remained completely silent and didn’t move once. At that point, I got up and felt her forehead to confirm what I was already sure of- she was indeed sick. We took a quick temp reading after that and it was official- a low-grade fever.

Wonder who’s next…

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Family

Quick Home Notes

The Wife has had a couple of tough hockey practices of late. She went down on her side hard earlier this week during a scrimmage. Then, yesterday, she went down on her rear, snapping her head back onto the ice. But she got up both times and soldiered on. She’s even planning on playing in the exhibition game this Sunday. For someone who didn’t spend much of her life involved with sports, the “toughness” aspect seems to come pretty naturally.

The boy has been marching steadily forward with his Martial Arts training. He’s now earned his 5th belt, a blue-green, belt. That’ll put him at the highest rank for the current children’s class that he’s in. He’ll also be a pretty young blue-green belt from what I’ve seen. Watching him during his “graduation” tonight, he’s clearly grown in his confidence.

The lass started practicing for her “Big Show.” That would be for her dance class. It’ll actually be a real recital. When she started her dance lessons, it was at the local YMCA and the teacher would, at the end of the 8 class session, have a big show where the kids would perform a little 5-minute dance to some kind of Disney princess song. They were referred to as “The Big Show.” She’s been taking a more formal dance class this year, so she’ll get a more formal recital. She enjoyed her Big Show’s, I’m guessing she’ll enjoy her recital as well.

As for me, it’s just steady as she goes.

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Family

How Does She Do That?

Picked up the lass from the bus today and she has a substitute sucker bus driver. As the lass is climbing down off the bus, the driver turns to me and says (roughly):

“She was a huge help today. She was telling me where all the other kids stops were, what way to go, who got off at each stop. She’s just adorable. I love her!!“

She said all this with a huge pleasant smile on her face making it clear that the lass had probably made at least her morning, probably her day and likely her week. It wouldn’t have surprised me if her bus driver had said she couldn’t wait to be on the bus with the lass again tomorrow!

All of this just left me in slack-jawed amazement at the powers of the lass. It’s one thing when the Grandparent’s are duped. I expect that because, well, they’re the Grandparents- they spoil the kids and then go home at the end of the day with a smile on their face knowing they can go home at the end of the day. As opposed to the Wife and I, who are stuck at home … with her. All the time.

… Sigh …

But I digress…

It’s one thing for family, but she regularly does this with complete strangers. She smiles at them, chirps a happily little tune and before you know it the stranger is dancing like a serpent in front of a charmer. She’s particularly effective with women (No idea why). It could be the teller at the bank, the bagger at the grocery store, the cashier at a store, an army drill instructor, the Grinch…

When they comment about how sweet/lovable she is, I used to retort “Live with her for a day and then tell me what you think.” It was always good for a laugh. But I don’t say that much anymore. The world is her roller coaster and I’m just along for the ride.

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Pack Parenting

During the boy’s hockey tournament this passed weekend, while coming off the ice after their second game, one of the boy’s friends and a teammate for the tournament snapped at another teammate “Get OUT OF THE WAY!” She had sat down at the end of the bench and the boy’s friend wanted to get through. His comment was not a request, it was an order and spoken with the corresponding force one would expect.

Suffice it to say, it was completely inappropriate and unacceptable, regardless that (for once!) the offender was not mine.

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“Vacation” Ends?

Well, Ol’ Man Winter stepped up to the plate and prolonged the lass’ vacation another day or so. The boy was none to thrilled about the prospect and even tried declaring that he wasn’t going to school because his sister wasn’t. Once again, he harped on it not being fair.

Someday, when he’s all-growed up, he’ll really appreciate the unfairness intrinsic to life. Perhaps, when that day comes, he’ll learn to make his peace with it as well.

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Hockey Tournament

Instead of the usual practice this morning, the hockey league ran a 3-on-3 tournament. We signed the boy up for it as it would be his best chance to play some “real” hockey. If you can call hockey without checking, penalties or goalies real hockey. The nets were tiny little things about 15 inches wide and 8 inches high or so.

The tournament was the first competitive environment in which the boy participated. He’s been in other less formal things like t-ball and the like, but they didn’t keep score during those games. They didn’t want any hurt feelings. But here, there was actually going to be a sanctioned winner. Meaning there would also be a bunch of losers. Welcome to the real world I say.

His relative inexperience showed. He was hesitant and unsure of where to be at various points, especially when the puck wasn’t in his immediate vicinity. But he wasn’t alone and I and the other parents just encouraged them to skate hard and play hard. After the first couple of games, they were doing just that. He managed to score a couple of goals along the way, making the whole thing a personal success for him. I made sure to point out that the goals were a reward for working hard during the games. No way to know for sure if the “work” aspect registered with him, but we did our best to point it out and reinforce it. When he scored a goal in the final second of his last game, I made sure to point out that it was great that he kept on going right to the end.

Probably the most amusing moment came after his first goal. Since there are no goalies, play essentially continues right after each goal so the scoring team can’t take too long to celebrate or they’ll give up an easy “answer” score. Well, the boy was so excited that he skated the entire length of the ice to tell me that he’d scored his goal. Meanwhile, play was continuing behind him. I had to give him a quick “Attaboy” and then usher him back out to help his shorthanded team. Luckily, no goals against during that sequence. (FWIW- the goal was a nice shot. He was about 10-12 feet away and off to the right of the goal at a tough angle when he shot. He caught the far side of the little net with a satisfying “DONG” when the puck hit the metal frame. A little excitement was justified I’d say.)

When it was all said and done, his team came in second place. A feat that generally seemed to please him. Although he did comment that he wanted to win first place. I’d have been disappointed and surprised if he’d stated otherwise, though I’d never tell him that. We told him to keep working hard and next time he might just come in first. It was good to see that he clearly enjoyed the experience. Considering that he had a 5:30 wakeup call this morning(the first game was at 7), having him in a good mood after it was all said and done was the biggest win of the day.

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The New England Aquarium

That’s where we spent our last day of vacation. It was a surprise for the kids, though they did their level best to get us to spill the beans ahead of time. After realizing the brute force approach wasn’t working (“Where are we going?” Answer: “You’ll see” or “To where we’re going.”) they started using more elaborate strategies. For instance, they’d ask if we were going to place ‘X’ in an attempt to narrow down the field of possibilities. They’d ask what city it was in. Or they’d ask if we’d been “there” before. Regardless of the tactic, we maintained our cone of silence right until our arrival.

The penguins were the big attraction. They were center stage around a massive center-column aquarium with all kinds of fish swimming around, including what looked like a couple of sand sharks. There were also some groupers and a couple of massive sea turtles. I’d say that aquarium was roughly 4 stories tall and about 50-60 feet in diameter. As big as it was, many of the fish in it looked cramped for space- especially the sharks and groupers.

Around the center-aquarium were a variety of smaller aquariums stuffed to the gills (ahem) with fish. A few of the tanks had some good sized fish, but mostly they were of the smaller variety. The high lite was when the kids got to see some Cuttle Fish eat shrimp. Let’s face it, Nature at her rawest is pretty cool in general.

We ended the day watching a 3-D Imax movie about fish of the sea. It was a little disappointing, in truth, because it spent a disproportionate amount of time on just a few types of fish, the Cuttle fish in particular. It was also narrated by Jim Carrey, whom made sure to take the time to lecture us about how evil we all are and how we’re destroying our oceans but “we’re starting to learn we can do things better” blah blah blah. Too bad a shark couldn’t take a bite out of his ass.

The fun thing about the 3-D was the lass, who repeatedly would put her hand out to “pet” or touch the fish. The end featured a section where seals were coming right up to the camera and that was when she was at her most frantic in attempts to pet the seals. It was amusing to watch. When everything was done, I asked her what the seals felt like. She replied “Dad, I couldn’t actually touch them! It was just a movie.”

Well, the 3-D hadn’t fooled me. But she certainly did.