Shortly after I started this blog, I wrote up this exhausting confrontation between an unstoppable force and an immovable object. Today I finally had a replay of that confrontation, only this time it was the lass playing the part of the unstoppable force. I’ll state up front that it was not on the same level as the battle with the boy, but it was the first time she and I crossed swords in public.
The setup is a familiar one. We’re out and the Wife is shopping. The kids are doing their thing running around and playing games because the time to play games and run around is when we’re out in a crowded store. The Wife and I both warned them to settle down. Multiple times. Between the two, the lass was clearly more reckless and inconsiderate. The final straw came when she ran into a woman whom was trying to get to the dressing rooms. When I caught up with her, I took her by the wrist and left it at that.
At first, she thought it was a game. She would swing around from one side of me to the other, twisting her arm, hanging from me. During this initial phase, the boy stayed quietly to the side- he knew what was going on and he wasn’t about to get in the middle of it. He also knew better than to taunt or tease her. The Wife continued to try on clothes.
She finally understood that this wasn’t an ordinary “hold Dad’s hand” situation when the Wife finished up and we started walking to the next destination and I did not let her go. The wrestling match started then, as did the complaining. And she was pleased not-at-all when I informed her that I wouldn’t be letting her hand go until we got back out to the car.
She fought with me, verbally and physically, for about 30 minutes. The low point came when the Wife disappeared out of her view for a time. She (the Wife) was looking at some jewelry to dress up an outfit and the lass wanted desperately to help. But I wouldn’t allow her to because I don’t typically follow the Wife through every counter. Since the lass was attached to me, she could not either. When the lass lost sight of her, the “enormity” of her situation finally became apparent and she started to cry that she couldn’t see Mom. It was only for a few seconds mind you; but to her, in that moment it might as well have been an eternity.
I didn’t relent then either. The Wife came back into view and the lass started to settle down. She also ceased with the wrist wrestling. Shortly after that, we went out to the car and I let her wrist go. She asked if I’d be holding her hand at the next place. I told her if she didn’t start behaving then yes, I’d be holding her hand.
When we did get to our next stop she got out of the car and waited for me. Then she took my hand and we walked together across the parking lot into the store, where I let her go.
One reply on “Dad vs the Lass”
The ‘ring around the wrist’ hold was a technique used by the grandfather for keeping the aunt under control when out in public. She had a similar pattern of testing the boundary of public behavior …. history repeats itself ….