A few weeks back, the boy had a shift on the ice with his house league hockey team. One particular shift was telling, as it was clear from the moment he got on the ice for that shift that he didn’t want to be in that position.
He prefers defense. He’s thinks he’s pretty good at it. Personally, I’d rate him at probably a bit lower than he himself does, but that’s OK. More importantly, because of his own impressions, he tries hard when he’s out there and he tries to get better at playing defense.
So when the coach sent him out to play right wing for a shift, he responded predictably: he didn’t try very hard.
After that game, I asked him about that shift and he said the coach wanted him to try it out. He quickly added “I don’t like offense though, I’m not very good at it so I didn’t try very hard while I was out there.”
“Well, that much was obvious,” I recall replying at the time.
I wasn’t referring to him not being good. I was referring to him not trying. Rather than hammering yet again on how he should be doing his best whenever he can, I opted for the team approach. Namely, that he’s on a team and they are counting on him to try his hardest when he’s out there. If he doesn’t, he may miss an opportunity to help the team out or worse, his lackadaisical approach might result in a score for the other team because he wasn’t in position or skating hard for the puck.
He didn’t appear overly impressed with my impromptu lesson. I can’t say I’m surprised. In general, there seems to be a selfishness to the average 9 year old that is tough to crack. It can be set aside for short durations and the boy is as good as any at being surprisingly generous. But it quickly resurfaces, especially when siblings are involved.
One more life lesson for him to learn.