Bad Pasta

What kind of parenting blog would be complete without a little puke?

Got home from the boy’s MA class tonight, and he went right to the couch with a stressed kind of breathing. Next thing I know, I get those 6 words every parent loves to hear: “I think I’m going to THROWUP!”

He made a bee-line for the bathroom, and pretty much just made it. Several minutes later, it was all over. I checked him and he didn’t have fever or anything, so I had him take a shower and, since it was close to bed time, basically just herded him to bed.

I made pasta with meatballs for dinner tonight. So far, the lass and I are fine. Of course, the lass loves pasta so much her body may be overriding the stomachs desire to evacuate. Here’s to hoping. As for the boy, I was thinking perhaps I hadn’t served him dinner far enough in advance of his MA class, so he’d gotten an upset stomach as a result of that.

Anyway, I’d just finished the greatest comeback in my history with WwF, when I heard the distinct coughing sounds of a child retching. When I made it upstairs, I discovered the boy hanging off the side of his bed, hovering over a puddle of noodles. Apparently, the puking process interferes with other neural pathways, because the boy continued to hover there, spitting onto the floor. When I asked him if he still had more, he grunted at me in reply. So I went over to him and got him moving towards the bathroom in case there was an encore.

Thankfully, there wasn’t. But I still had the mess to clean up. Upon closer inspection, he’d nailed the side of his bed as well. So I did the bed strip-tease and got that laundry going. In the meantime, what can I use to clean puke out of the carpet? Murhpy’s Oil Soap? No. Orange Cleaner? No. Resolve Stain Remover? No. Finally, I found some Woolite which seemed likely to be my best option. By then, I noticed my socks were wet. Which is great, because I’m sure when foot sweat and residual puke get together, it’s good times!

So the boy’s bed has been remade and I’ve spot cleaned the floor. I’ve also left him with a bucket. I thought I was doing pretty well, but then the boy appeared (while I’m on my hands and knees cleaning the carpet) and says “Aren’t you going to put a cold towel on my neck?”

After considering him for a moment, I replied “Do you feel hot? Like you’ve got a fever?”

“No” he said, “but that’s what Mom always does.”

Mom is, unfortunately, away at the moment, so it’s just me. And the pukes. I finally told him “Well, go ahead if that’ll make you feel better.” So he did.

He also wanted to know if he was going to school tomorrow- he’s always thinking ahead. I suppose I should commend him for trying to find a silver lining, but his silver lining will cause me some issues tomorrow. All I could tell him is that first we had to get him through tonight, and we’d see what tomorrow will bring.

At least in this case, I know what I hope it won’t bring.