On being 6

Back in the Spring, I recall the boy arguing about his bedtime. With the days getting longer and their bedtime of 8, he argued that he should be allowed to stay up later because it was still light out when he was going to bed. I recall being impressed because he was not just whining for a later bedtime- he was actually making an argument. For the record, we relaxed the bedtime thing when Summer vacation started.

What I didn’t, and likely couldn’t, realize at the time was that his new found ability was just going to be the tip of the ice berg. He has changed a great deal in a short amount of time. Those changes continue and the Wife and I are working to guide him along his way.

He perceives the world as winners and losers and he gets very upset with not being the winner. When watching football games, his first question is for the score so he can determine who is winning. That is who he roots for. Seemingly related, everything involving his sister is a competition- first to brush their teeth, first in the car, first out the door.

His mood swings are swift. I was playing catch with him with a Nerf football. One of my throws slipped through his hands and biffed him in the face. Catch was over and he was “mad” for the next 20 minutes. If he gets frustrated at something, especially with something he thought himself capable, he reduces to tears of fury and frustration. In both instances, we try to coach him through the breakdown.

The flipside of that last point is there are things he judges beyond his ability. Those things he will fight doing to the last. If he does eventually try, then his attempts are half-hearted and doomed from the get go.

Defiance also seems to be a significant trait. Chores or helping out, even going to school or his karate classes are all fair game for his whims.

Anything that doesn’t suit his needs is “stupid.” Anyone who gets in his way is “not nice” (I know, that could be a lot worse).

I don’t know what we’ll get after this phase is over. But the Wife and I are both convinced the vast majority of these behaviors are age related. My looking around on the web supports this impression. We appreciate his more docile and cooperative moments- they assure us that the boy we’ve tried to raise is in fact still around.

He’s just growing up a little, that’s all.