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Finding Out if Less is More

I picked up the kids at school today and it was obvious something was bothering the boy. Probably had a lot to do with the taciturn demeanor and the glum expression on his face. Whatever it was, it seemed to be affecting the lass as well since she was just as quiet. I tried to pry something out of him, but he was clammed up tight. So I didn’t bother pushing.

After we’d arrived at the house, both kids went up to their rooms. The Wife came down after several minutes and informed me that the boy had opened up to her. Apparently, the boy had sat down with his teacher to gone over a worksheet with her. The teacher had corrected everything on the paper and he was upset by the experience.

Personally, I think the boy is being a bit thin skinned, but the Wife is more on his side though and was wondering if his teacher might have been a bit over the top. Now, we’re thin on details so it’s difficult to say. The Wife told me that it wasn’t clear what had transpired between the boy and his teacher based on what the boy had told her. But from her perspective, it was enough to really upset him and that was her primary concern.

The boy came downstairs, ready for his martial arts class and apparently the talk with his Mom had helped his mood considerably. I figured I’d pry into things and see what I could glean about the situation.

But I never did.

For one, the boy seemed to be over whatever was bothering him, this appearance, more than anything else, compelled me to hold back on questioning him. And the longer I held back, I started thinking of other possibilities as well. He’d spoken with the Wife already, so he’d already gotten it off his chest. Also, he wasn’t bringing it up, so maybe he just didn’t want to talk to me about it.

So I opted to respect his space.

The rest of the evening went off without any problems. He finished his outstanding homework and even took some constructive criticism along the way.

It’s easy to fall into the mode of wanting to know and be involved in every little detail of your child’s life. We parents do that because we want to make sure we’re there to help them with their struggle. But they’re growing all the time, and there does come a point where they have to be able to handle their own problems. Maybe they can pick some of those moments themselves.

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